Unassuming

Another person was discharged from a nursing home - under my watch yesterday. Actually, I verified the transition via phone. An achievement, or at least a number. Perhaps a number that will enrich or allow for someone else (unnamed agency) to soak in the glory. Fine for them, but as for me, I am satisfied in the small part I play. Numbers vs outcomes, both important in the grand scheme. However, I am content to let the others bask while I merely coordinate...

Ready, aim, etc

All seems a little better – the consumer is being discharged today. All confusion seemed to be in a change in home care agencies, but it ought to happen without fanfare.

I did send a secure e-mail to the main (unnamed) agency. My contact had no idea of this impending discharge, no approved budget or other approved paperwork. Much like “I have no idea what you are talking about” is the theme.  Of course I am irritated, I do have CYA copies of every piece of paper including myriad e-mails. Grumbling, I prepared a fax, not a missive but pointed. Should I get mad, even or neither? The latter is a better course of action…I got an apology shortly after that, no doubt proving no culpability.

I guess the process often goes like this: 1.) READY; 2.) FIRE; 3.) AIM, not the usual cliché we were told (much like the old standby ‘Measure twice, cut once’). I can merely observe here, recognizing what I can actually make happen on my own – not expecting others to do what they ought to…

Job Description

I seem to be in a fog as to what is going on with some consumers I work with, and the care plan agencies that administer these plans. On Friday, a scheduled day off, I spoke with a care planner who has set up their home care agency home evaluation. Mind you, the date of discharge was set for 1 November and this eval was happening on the last possible day. Further, I called (on my day off) the planner who advised that the apartment might not allow for a ‘safe’ discharge.

I was polite, but thinking all along: the person is question uses a manual wheelchair, and yet I have been in the apartment with my power wheelchair, so I can’t imagine the safety being an issue. I spoke with the management company and they installed a 17” high toilet and bathtub cut – both for issues of safety, and I am cognizant about making safe transfers from a ‘chair.. I am annoyed at the way this sounded. Okay, it was Friday – forget the job until Monday and be prepared for a delightful or disappointing day then. It gnaws at me  how the details are not attended to by everyone else…

Clarifications

Regarding my previous post, I probably ought to clarify a few points bout this blog so as to keep me focused onto my greater ambition, which is the ultimate independence, which is working for myself.

• Being involved with people in nursing homes, I am bound to pay attention to HIPAA privacy rules (the acronym stands for the Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act). I do not use any names, nursing homes, or medical conditions regarding any individual consumers I work with. So I keep the subject of nursing homes and residents quite bland  
• I keep the names of state agencies unnamed, one of these a very well known acronym. As well as the individuals who act egregiously. 
• There are state employees who have worked professionally, too. So I wouldn’t want to imply that the (union) workers are in the cause of the majority of the workers. 
• Given that anonymous persons and agencies are cited, the situations change slightly in actual context, but not scope. I am not anti-union, nor against bargaining units for the employees. But things like not being able to attend meetings ‘because I couldn’t get a state car’ type excuses are vexing, even if the state car is in the contract…

So I write about what I know in the attempt to keep me focused on the next phase of my independence in career. I want to remember the incidents that will compel me to work for myself, to succeed or fail on my merits, work ethic, on what I did (or failed to do). That’s all.

If any reader remembers the Dragnet TV series (1967-1970) the stern voice on the intro would say something that I have paraphrased as follows: ‘The post you are about to read is true. The names have been changed to protect the innocent guilty’  As Sgt. Friday might have intoned to the witness “Just the facts”

Smashing through any doubt...

Breaking through not so insurmountable barriers. Photo taken by Grandpa (Ralph I), ca. 1939

I do not care for much of what I do. I offer an example of how the frustration of the job affect my thinking about said part-time job. There is another state agency (lets call it unnamed II), and one employee I needed to work with who is a non-performer according to some. This person made three (3) scheduled appointments in a three week period. with a client, and didn't show up. The job (TC) I hold is the one where we are taken to task because we are more visible, the state employees who choose not to, well, not so much.

I was advised to contact the supervisor of the offending state employee. I was only able to leave a voice-mail missive, polite but to the point. I even used the term 'unprofessional' (I was advised later to keep opinion out of it. A fine thought, but as I had had it by then, I'll try better next time. It would be nice if all government employees worked as required). A day later without a reply, I contacted the employee and left that person a voice mail missive, polite but pointed. I received a Arrrugh message later that she "didn't appreciate my tone". So be it. This is what I have tired of, the state employee sense of entitlement. Yet I have to work with them - without the authority to make them work...

The baseball shatters the glass with ease. I need to be hitting my own line drives to move beyond my own limitations. I posted two different contractor positions on the local craigslist (here and here), but I need to sell my own abilities - to myself!

Skill Sets

I have missed a few weeks on this blog – and I really missed it! I have such a skill set, yet I am unable to see it in real time. Yet sometimes something clicks and I am amazed that I don’t always recognize it. Could I be a resume writer and/or career counselor? I’d normally say no…

A neighbor friend of ours stopped in yesterday. She had been on the wait staff of a local outlet of a nationally known breakfast chain and was terminated, ostensibly due to age. She needed a resume and had lots of handwritten notes about her career in retail, and she would pay for it. Not to worry, I wouldn’t charge a friend. I asked for Saturday to present a rough draft.

She had to talk, and she said that she was going to go for age discrimination. I said, with your experience, why?

·       Let it go, it will consume you when all you want to do is work

·       I have been through CHRO (Ct. Commission on Human Rights & Opportunities) and I don’t feel that you would get redress anyway

·       The restaurant is having a cash problem and were going to eliminate this position

In fact, I said that when questioned about why you left your job, just say: “the average transaction at the restaurant has fallen due to the economy, and they had to reduce their head count”

Was that me?? It all sounds like sage advice, and I said all this without notes or without memorizing anything. I amazed me, yet should I be? I know a thing or two about jobs, having had a few…

I completed a draft of the resume in about 45 minutes. She wants to go back to retail, where she was years ago pre-kids. It reads well, too. I started with her skill set, written like this:

·       The ability to lead, not merely in the supervision of staff but in the effective motivation and training of new and existing staff.

·       Attentive customer service in a variety of food and retail establishments.

·       Knowledge of restaurant operations either independent or chain operations.

·       A proven increase in departmental sales, enhancing in company growth as well as meriting individual promotions.

·       A thorough knowledge of retail advertising and display merchandising that lead to increased traffic and sales.

·       Complete involvement in proper merchandise ordering, correct inventory levels and reorder points.

·       Setting budgets, with the ability to work at or under these budgets ensuring profitable operations.

·       Managing customer bills and receipts and the proper reconciliation.

Why do I doubt my abilities? This was good, and I do want to work for myself. Could I?

Which yellow brick road to take?

The directions can be opaque, and never crystal clear. I am sure about not wanting to continue with the work that I do, yet I do continue to do so. 

The transition coordinating has its oddities and share of complications. You might think that I relish the challenge and have just enough ego to rise to said challenge - a conquering hero of sorts (a well-worn cliché). But it all seems tiring and a never ending challenge.

The cone as sundial - or is it a compass needle I am to follow?? Photo by Ralph

I am working with a person who was discharged recently. She has the PCA waiver, in which (unnamed) pays for the services of the assistants, while the discharged client acts as an employer. This is a tough task for many persons as in a nursing home, a dependency is fostered where someone shows up to do this or that for you. The longer one stays in a skilled nursing facility (the formal term in use that I would never use to describe these places...), the more dependent one becomes.

So this person has five PCAs in her schedule. Contrary to Independent Living preferred practice, I did a lot of the work for the consumer - advertising and locating potential, arranged for the interviews by the client and when approved, I created a schedule. Independent living really dictates that the client really do all the work - although the client needed help. so supergimp Ralph jumped into the hiring fray. 

The client can be demanding after being provided all services in the home. So far, one PCA has resigned, one more (I hear this in third person) may. Yet, I have to spring into action, the other day checking by geography potential recruits. Based on a phone call, and an e-mail of documents, there may be hope for another PCA. I hope...

Discharged clients who end up back in these facilities can make things difficult for the coordinators. As I work for a contractor the state (unnamed) cannot dictate  what constitutes an offense that can lead to dismissal. Yet, terminating my position could have a happy ending. I say could, because there is a lot of downside to being asked to leave, especially in a society that views the disabled as failures of sorts anyway. So failure is not an option. Yet, from many directions, outcomes are not guaranteed. So I ask as I have been, am I bold enough to resign and take my chances on income on my terms?

It’s not who you know, It’s what...

It has been a week since my last post. Yet I remain committed to a change while events keep me on the track I have been on and missing the switches that offer a spur line into change. The train metaphor is apt as the heavy locomotive moves along with inertia, and thus keeps on going despite the application of the brakes - what I need to at least consider.

Yet, during the past week , I see a bit of confidence in my approach, perhaps there is hope that I can use the bit of intellect that I possess. In this case, perhaps it is as (noted before) a disability consultant.

The non-profit I work for had its fund raiser this morning. Referred to as the 2010 Wheel-a-Thon, there were two obstacle courses whereby teams mounted manual wheelchairs, and team pledges were added up and team elapsed times were tallied for winners, and a cook-out lunch was provided. A fun time near Long Island Sound on a beautiful day.

Yet I had no real responsibilities for the day. I didn’t even receive the loud yellow Staff Member tee-shirt. So an observer I was. Yet there were two women who corralled me, perhaps as they had a few questions that a wheelchair driver could answer. Which was the case. It was an older mother and her younger daughter. The questions at first had to do with the power wheelchair for the husband of mom:

Q - How much did your (wheelchair) cost?

A - A basic power chair (Pride Jet) like mine is about $4000 new. I bought this chair like new through my company for $700

Q - Can you take your apart for travel

A - No, and I don’t think the units that can be broken down are ideal - you would probably get tired of trying to lift the heavy batteries every time you travel.

So, I asked a couple of questions that were pertinent: Does your husband have Medicare? If approved, it would be a 20% co-pay, so the $4000 would be a co-pay of $800

Next I asked if he could walk. Apparently he can stand and move for short distances with a walker - he needs a wheelchair. So then I mentioned that a van would be optimal. Would you like to see mine to get an idea? They would. I was able to explain how the wheelchair works well with this type of modified minivan. Except these are expensive. 

Q - Is there anybody that can help in getting one?

A - I suggested that Social Security maybe through Medicare, although I don’t think so. What about a used one? His wheelchair can be easily tied down in the van, so no battery lifting would be needed.

I suggested that they contact the place where my van was modified, Advanced Wheels in East Granby near the Hartford Airport. All they do is modify wheelchair vans, and ask for John, Christian or Jason to see if they have anything used or any ideas. I have their phone number committed to memory and the daughter took all the info down on her I-Phone (I am merely a satisfied customer of this company, not a paid shill. My 2008 Grand Caravan is the third vehicle I own that was modified by them, and they will get answers for you). They left satisfied with the answers.

The point I am trying to make is that I know these issues. Two people were apprehensive about their plight, and by my knowledge, experience and manner, I was able to take the edge off the women’s fears. Perhaps I was able to erase the answer we so often see - the easy to say words ‘No' or ‘Never' are often what we say. Hopefully I was able to allow them to see the possibilities, the harder to say ‘Maybe' or even ‘Yes' just might be the outcome. I spoke as naturally as I do, with a command of the facts and possibilities that were not considered. This is the third time in the past week where my knowledge of wheelchairs and egress answered questions that seemed daunting at first. I know what I speaketh, and can present it well.

A disability consultant? Why not??

Substituting fact for...fact

It is obvious that October 1 is going to pass with me still in my position As much as I want to, events are conspiring against my moving out. As I have written, the income I require to make a move (with the Social Security disability and income limits) is quite low. So my minimal $ requirements shouldn’t preclude a move.

In fact, the state vocational high school in our area is literally around the corner from our house (800 or so feet) and they are looking for substitute teachers. The per-diem is wonderful. Around twice what it when I subbed three years ago.

Why would I want to sub again after my stint with this is a middle school? This could be more lucrative, but still…Being broke and unemployed and with no disability payments at the time, anything that paid anything was an option that was becoming closer to acceptable.

So I applied at Kelly Educational who handles the sub duties in a number of local districts around here and nationwide. After the fingerprints were taken and the background check performed ($49 out of my pocket) I was ready. Ready being a relative term here.

I generally ended up in a music classroom. Why there, when I cannot

• Read music
• Play an instrument
• Sing or act

The reason was that the teacher in question was embroiled in a termination issue that may be recounted here soon. At any rate, with few lesson plans and 6-8 grade students bored, itching for action and a sub with no authority (the past as prologue – how odd that jobs in 2007 and 2010 have the same issues…). I got used to saying to any challenges to the lesson by any student: Hey, it’s not my ‘F’

I had had enough at this middle school. Without too many specifics, let’s just say that I lost my cool with the most disruptive seventh grade class one day to the point that I was asked to not come back as a sub.

I offer no alibi no excuses as to why I was asked to leave. The oddity here is that I had decided to give this assignment up after the previous day’s assignment, but when the assignment call/e-mail arrived this morning, I blindly accepted it and that led to my undoing. Not that the mere $75.00 made the middle-school maelstrom worth it all. As strange as it seems, these situations sometimes have to end in the worst possible way to make sure that it has ended for sure, slay the dragon for real.

So despite the bump in pay and general dissatisfaction with my current employ, could this be worse? Yet any and all issues remain moot until I decide to stay or to go

If I only had the authority

Authority - what a concept. I'd like to have some...I worked with a consumer in a discharge. The care plan person (from unnamed) had a plan approved with a discharge for a particular date. It was apparent that nothing would get in the way.

Given my use of a power chair I know ramps – and this consumer can live without it but would be better off if a ramp were installed. However, I deferred to the care planner – the one with the authority, so no ramp…

Let’s move ahead several months. I received a message from (unnamed). The consumer needs a ramp I am told – have you obtained the bids yet??

Given my schedule I have visited the consumer and owner to see how substantial the work might be, and it will be. However, more referrals were thrown at me (with ASAP written all over). So I haven’t yet contacted the list of approved contractors. Although the care planner contacted me the other day – can assistance be offered to get this going? Nice that I was asked. My 18-hour workweek will be exhausted by Wednesday - my workdays are very full.

I will contact the planner with the list of approved contractors (today is Labor Day, a day to labor, right?) and a list of days the owner will be available. Major changes ought to get the owner’s approval IMO…

I am of the opinion that the care planner needed to have the ramp specified in the beginning. Not to whine, and it was nice that I was asked for help, but I am waiting for the fallout should the bids not received soon. I have had it with finger pointing and blame, and would be happy to take any of that – if I only had the authority…

Finger pointing exercise

The term ‘transition coordinator’ seems innocuous enough, you coordinate others who perform the duties that they are assigned, and all works out in the end, a safe discharge the result.

Pointing the way??

That’s the theory, anyway. 

The ‘responsibility vs. authority’ argument seems pretty clear here. I am the point person, the visible one who has to be certain the care plan is adhered to by the various care planners. I am merely an administrator. So the discharge on Monday occurred, with an interesting mix of problems that indicate a lack of focus by others - that I have to address and hopefully fix. Not my job? So there!

Lets start with the facility person who arranges the discharge. As medications will be needed, an appointment with the consumer’s physician is needed. Given that this person doesn’t drive, a method of transport to the doctor’s office is to be determined.

So the  appointment was made for the following day at 3:45 PM. I set up the PCA schedule, and can you guess - there was not a PCA scheduled who could drive the consumer then! Call it a mistake, but hey, why ask me what a good day might have been since I only created the schedules. Thanks...

Exit stage left??

The bigger issue is that after a call to the doctor, there were no other times available this week and there is a finite supply of meds. The transport for Title XIX (Medicaid) requires 48 hour notice. A fabulous sales job by me (30 minutes) convinced them to schedule a pickup for the appointment in <24 hours.

Let’s follow the what-ifs:

• the meds run out
• the consumer was unable to get to the doctor to get a new supply

Who has the ultimate responsibility here? You’d think the nursing home personnel, who have to provide a safe discharge, might have sweated the details a tiny bit. Au contraire! Any problems fall onto me. I am not averse to work, but where ought the blame ultimately be placed? There are a few other sidebars to this story I’ll ignore, but you get the idea...

Let’s not be silly Ralph - the blame is to fall on you! Responsibility vs. authority. It is a simple enough concept that I get it. What about the other players?


So much behavior here seems so old. Change can be good for the soul, my mantra should be change is good, change is good, etc. Wheelchair or not...

Building a new career - why?

Construction zone. Photo by Ralph

Building my future is imperative, says I. Yet, attention as to what move to make is harder to ascertain. Perhaps I need to review the positives of the part-time position I hold. I am a Transition Coordinator (TC), working for a (non-profit) contractor to the state. I am to help people transition from nursing homes by setting up transition teams to work all the issues. 

Click to enlarge

To make sense of it, I am posting the formal job description (above). Admittedly, I have been unable to achieve the transition goals stated - given that I work 18 hours, the goals may not be achievable. 


What is not said anywhere in the description is the the TC really has most of the responsibilities - but zero real-world authority. Too many anecdotes to list in one post, but should any other party (state social workers, nursing facility personnel, other care plan agencies and state workers) fail, the TC is the point person for those failures. 


Working in the jet engine machined parts business in the past, all parts were carefully engineered to avoid a single point of failure. As a TC, I am considered that single point. (Never did I consider that similar design flaws existed between the aerospace and non-profit business models...)


I will be involved in a discharge tomorrow, Sept. 8, 14 and 27. To be involved in helping people being discharged from nursing facilities (places I do not care for much) can have its own rewards. I like the consumers for the most part, but the other players so often erode any satisfaction there may be.


Am I being negative? There is a probability of that. However, I am thinking beyond this position. I would be happier if all the players had the same sense of urgency about the discharge as the TC’s in this state all do. And they really do - alone, it seems.


I have to make a change!

Long term planning - sort of

In my part-time position I work as a transition coordinator to assist persons being discharged from nursing homes. Basically I have to keep all the disparate elements focused on the goal of the discharge - be they state personnel, facility personnel and so on.

Emphasis needed. Photo by Patti

Today I was swamped with one woman who must be discharged on September 8. Busy afternoon, after about 15 different e-mails in regards to this case. I guess I haven’t been thinking about my transition today, as time to think (straight) was in short supply. So the thinking is going like this - I like the consumers that I have been assigned, the process and I differ as to what is effective vs. the process that exists...




I think that I have a sense that payment terms from the state to their contractors may be delayed due to the budget deficit issues in the state I live in. So payments may slow substantially - would my break occur if operating cash at my employer runs low. Therefore, my long term goals remain as before, my smarts to lead the way. Or at least I hope so... 

Indecision should be harder than making a decision

The title seems perfectly true - however, the inverse is often the reality. It is Sunday, and I need to go to the office and visit a consumer tomorrow. I want to break away, but as I dither, nothing has yet been decided on the October 1 by any party. I said I would reconsider, and I did. I really want to move out of the project that funds my part-time position. I would have no problem with being a part of this non-profit, although I know that there is probably no funding source for anything else.

Ah, guilt shows up on occasion, too. Co-workers would have to take up the slack, and consumers I have would have to be reassigned to others. Would I be running out on co-workers irresponsibly? Naturally, it is a selfish move, but is that bad?? What about me, should I be preeminent in my moves, or accede to other people and entities? 

Do I hit the ball hard and miss the hole, or hit it softly and not make it? Likewise, should I stay (the easier course) or move on (fraught with some peril)? Photo by Cam  

I need to contact the one who (sort of) rejected my resignation - and we have to make decisions. I need to make the first move, as I do not want to keep hanging on without making a decision on my future...

Driving a wedge?

I missed a couple of days, my part-time job requiring a bit of actual busy work, that took up blogging time :>(

Much of this time was spent driving to various sites in a far-flung territory. I am working with consumers in the Connecticut towns/cities of Middletown (40 miles from home and/or the office) and Norwalk (30 miles fro each) in some of the toughest traffic on earth, I-95 and the Merritt Parkway. It’s not that I am adverse to driving per se, but I have amassed 6,000 miles on my 2008 Grand Caravan wheelchair van since March. Even if the work miles are reimbursed, this van has to last at least as my previous Ford, which was donated to a non-profit with twelve years and 158,000 miles. I do not wish to wear out this vehicle at a 15K per year

The (unnamed) governmental entity I work with makes it hard to understand how anything gets done on that level. If (unnamed) personnel are to be at an important meeting, sometimes the meeting may have to be postponed because their local office doesn’t have a state car available to make the trip. No car available? Surely not their own…I wouldn’t mind having a company car with other entities (taxpayers) are paying me to drive. I utilize my employer’s general liability when on the job. I thought everyone else did.

No state car available. Important people missing events because no car is available? That is irritating.

Not to knock government, but it seems that process matters most - not necessarily outcomes. Perhaps not in reality, but appearances speak quite loudly…

Spam to the left, spam to the right

The search continues. Photo by Patti

I recently created an ad on craigslist for a position wanted for myself. Interestingly, I received the following reply, which is spam. Why I chose not to continue is the syntax, as the structure and text is not American English. But where from: India? Bahamas? Jamaica? Or perhaps the place of Mass scams, Nigeria. I see many oddities, can anyone else?

ATTN: Sequel to your resume on (Craigslist.org),your resume have been reviewed by our company (------ ---- Inc) and our hiring officer will like to conduct an online interview with you to discuss more about the Job Position that you are yet to occupy. Set Up a Screen name with the Yahoo Instant Messenger or if you have a yahoo or msn or hotmail, you can use it and add up Mrs Mcjenny Mayne:  On Comprehensive online training shall be provided as this is work from home.

I am not used to adding up anybody, and the name of the contact? Thanks, but no thanks…Opportunities exist, and in general I like craigslist, but really, I don't speak their style of English, and thus will skip the reply...

Confusion reigns

Went to dinner with colleagues last night. The ambience was cloudy with a cool humidity  permeating the outdoor restaurant seating just above the waterline. Arrived early with one co-worker who was (unofficially) aware of my plans. He asked what the boss said, and I noted that he folded up the letter and said we need to talk about this later. So, had I changed my mind?

I said maybe, perhaps I’ll count to ten again. I had to speak candidly with supervision. So after food and fun conversation last night, I am looking at the possible options. Could I work at this position as a contractor, working for a 1099 at no more that 20 hours per week, while looking for income sources for more hours? I am intrigued that perhaps I could slightly disassociate my feelings about (unnamed) by working more for myself with less emotional attachment to one employer

Pulled every which way (simultaneously)

Monday, I remained ambivalent about giving my supervisor the letter of resignation. But after an exhausting Monday getting ready for the site-review on Tuesday by the (unnamed) unit of the (unnamed) state agency, I kept busy until a slight from one of the (unnamed) units lit the fuse. I would, and did present the letter to my boss. 

This is from 1996 when my first van had to be towed 58 miles away for a major fix to the adaptive equipment such as the lift and wiring issues. It was a helpless feeling to see it get towed away, and have no egress to the outside world for a week. I am not feeling helpless these days. Photo by Patti


He said that he wouldn’t accept this, as there may be other opportunities at the non-profit (I do not know where) and we need to discuss after the audit. I though that he was giving me the the chance to count to ten again, the proverbial ‘time out’. So I am glad to have made a decision, but have no idea what is to occur next.

Speaking of the review, we were told to prepare for a time of 11:00 - 1:00, so I made an appointment for 3:00 at a place about 40 minutes from our office, with at least ten minutes to find a parking place for my wheelchair van at that facility, and another five minutes to transfer from the special driver’ seat into my wheelchair. I figured that I had enough time. 


The site-review person arrived at 1:45. I could only gather the files to be reviewed, give to my boss and leave for my appointment. Apparently this person had a site-review at another nearby contractor, and ran late. (Not that a real schedule might be made and adhered to). Things happen, but I made my work appointment based on the state agency to be on time. Sheesh...

I await the future not with trepidation nor with dread. I would like to decouple from my particular position and (unnamed), but do see a fine future whichever way things go...

Note: I prefer to not name names, so am keeping the agencies and personnel anonymous. I know at least five people who if they read my blog (the blog being unannounced to my colleagues), would recognize the narrative. Discretion the better part of valor, and so on...

Which yeollw brick road should I take?

Tomorrow is the site-review by (unnamed), an audit of their contractors on the project I and my colleagues are involved with. Certainly I was focused today on checking and updating consumer files. Not that I don’t expect fault to be found - when you are working with other people’s money, they rightfully expect to verify.

Although I am concerned that this audit is, say, about nine months behind when it ought to have been held. If any others who work in the same capacity for other contractors have been doing things incorrectly, there is a year’s worth of error. Horrors, unless this audit at this time is designed to find fault? 

(I hate conspiracy theories where unrelated events line up so neatly to prove a conspiracy so perfectly. I ought to think this over a little bit. Of course, in an era of huge budget deficits on a state level, some costs may have to be reduced, and contracting expenses may have to be).

But not to digress. I did get a supervisory review, and it was generally favorable. The only brickbat was my case notes. The term minimalist shows up, and we had this philosophical discussion a couple of weeks ago. I suppose my background in for-profit businesses prompted me to write case notes using formats and bullets, trying to get to the point. Alas, it seems in the world of non-profits, stuffy narratives are the norm. No doubt a function of my past, I like bullets to get to the point - not read until word 300 what the point of this case/service note was...

I hadn’t considered that.

I may be afforded the opportunity to move on at someone’s request. Or my own. The path to take is out there. Can I decide the correct path to take? 

What to do...continued

I was hoping to not work with the resignation for the rest of the weekend, but...I was looking at the compensation I feel I am owed. And looking closely at the employer's policies and procedures manual online. I had originally intended to look at chapter and verse of the issues such as unused and accrued vacation time, bonuses (as I received last year), etc.


I started to read further though. It seems that many procedures weren't followed to the letter on the company end, such as performance reviews. I know that we have to provide services with substantially less funding and thus a lesser staff and there are only 24 hours (max) per day, and things have to move fast. But there are administrative things that we all have to adhere to...


It was an eye-opener to become familiar with the policies that all have to adhere to...I like the organization, and the people - procedure must be followed, and I feel that it really hasn't. So I am torn about the idea of staying vs. leaving - and the easiest course would be if the job were defunded, leaving the decision for someone else. The easy course of action is for someone else to make the move for me - probably not the actual case, I am afraid...

Either or Both Ways

As I noted yesterday, I have written the proposed letter of resignation. I have even run the numbers of what I feel that I am actually owed in unrealized compensation at the end of my employ (that would be if my position were eliminated or I leave on my own). The look at the facts, my employ as it relates to the facts and so almost gives an air of guilt - what about the remaining consumers and how that could increase my co-workers workload is troubling. I have laid out reasons why I ought to consider a move. The things that could be problematical to my conscience stand out in my prose. It was not negative in the abstract of working with the (unnamed) state agency, but more positive in my wanting to search for opportunity for myself. Two ways of going, either fraught with the unknown.

All in all, a therapeutic process that I will now ignore for the rest of the weekend...